Quantcast

Orchard Park Police On Lookout For Serial Pooper That's Wreaking Havoc On Area Lawns

While it’s very true that when you have to go, you simply have to go, there’s a whole lot to be said for tending to your business before it becomes an issue. Most fully functioning adults are well aware of this simple fact, and they build some extra time into their daily rituals to accommodate for the calls of nature.

For the creatures of habit among us, a trip to the restroom is imperative prior to leaving the house for the day.

Taking that simple step will help you to avoid having to take care of it elsewhere, which isn’t always the most convenient thing in the world. Absent things that may naturally arise during the course of an average day, some things are just best tended to at home whenever possible.

All of that is a really nice way of addressing a somewhat uncomfortable question: if you know you’re on the regular side and need to go at certain times, then why on earth wouldn’t you take care of it before leaving the house?

We get it. Life gets in the way sometimes, and you need to take off at a moment’s notice. That’s an unavoidable occurrence, but repeatedly neglecting to take care of business when you basically have the same routine every day is on the highly questionable side.

The judgment of this jogger in Orchard Park, New York is certainly on the questionable side, and area police have a rather smelly caper on their hands as a result.

As the Huffington Post shares, residents have reported finding feces and tissues on their front lawns, and some homes have even been targeted more than once. The prime suspect has yet to be identified, but a clear warning sign has been posted in the area.

“To the person/jogger who is pooping on our lawns in the village of O.P.: Stop,” the sign reads.

While that’s enough to get the point across, the sign also goes on to explain exactly what the problem is.

“You are violating a health ordinance that prohibits depositing untreated sewage on land or water!!! You are putting our neighborhood at a serious health risk, especially children! We have installed trail cams to identify you!” the note continues. “The Orchard Park police are increasing patrols in our area!”

For even more emphasis than the liberal use of exclamation points could ever provide, the damning sign was signed by “The homeowners whose property you invaded.”

Police acknowledge that they don’t have much else to go on at this point, so there hasn’t been all that much movement in the investigation as of yet.

That said, security cameras and increased patrols could have encouraged the serial defecator to take care of his or her business elsewhere, so we may never know exactly who was letting it rip on lawns throughout the tight-knit community of Orchard Park.

Surprisingly, this doesn’t appear to be an isolated incident. Earlier this year, there was another serial pooper that was defecating on lawns throughout Colorado Springs, Colorado. That pooper was targeting one specific house, and the prime suspect has been identified as a female jogger.

We sincerely hope that this is not the start of a new trend within the jogging community.

Source: HuffPost
Photo: Roadgeek Adam/Flickr, Orchard Park Pennysaver, YouTube

Tell Us What You Think

More News Stories

After a 33-year career on late-night television, 'Late Show' host David Letterman retired in 2015. The 70-year-old recently dished on a number of...

“Liberal fascists” are responsible for allegations of sexual harassment at Fox News, according to Sean Hannity, one of the network’s top-rated...

In the closet of an abandoned house in Dayton, Ohio, a 12-year-old boy found a mummified body. The boy was exploring the home when he found the...

As developers in America buy up and build on any piece of untouched land they can find, animals are forced out of their natural habitats and...

In a viral Reddit post, 23-year-old Alyssa Pearce explained that she suffered years of “physical, emotional, and sexual abuse at the hands of two...

Latest News Stories

President Donald Trump and his wife, First Lady Melania Trump, have been under the public microscope ever since Donald Trump announced his...

She had been dating him for two years only to discover that her 'boyfriend' was not who she thought he was. It was, in fact, her female friend....

On Friday, presumptive GOP nominee Donald Trump was interviewed by George Stephanopoulos on ABC's "Good Morning America." During the questioning,...

Donald Trump is wrong when he accuses electoral officials and the news media of manipulating the voting process to ensure that Hillary Clinton...

Residents of a Nigerian community have complained about the violence and non-existent security in their area and have repeatedly asked their...